It was Eve who made Adam eat the forbidden fruit. It was Eve who spoke first with the devil and made all of humanity suffer in this world. If not for Eve, humanity would know no strife, hunger or shame.
By nature of sex appeal do women elicit men into evil affairs. Adam by himself lived a life of harmony.
Men, this truth is by know means limited to the book of Genesis. Account your past weeks. And I ask you, how many times did a pair of breasts tempt you? How many time did the lascivious quiver of the lips, or sway of the hips, had you an inch away from throwing away your mortal soul?
Men, we all know the answer. Women with their beauty, with their sex they so shamelessly exude, provoke the fallen nature of man.
Look back to your days in grade school. How simple were the days of the playground, when all the girls had cooties? How simple was it when know girl could manage to seduce you?
Now look to those days of higher learning. Of the times of Junior High and High School. How often have you seen the beauty of a fraternal bond squandered over a worthless piece of meat?
My men, I say too often!
Too often have women spoken!
Too often have women lied!
It was Eve who claimed the sweetness of that so awful fruit, which has this world in such tumultuous torture.
My men, I say it is too often women seduce us, and promise us the delights of flesh that so often pain us later.
My, men there are two options to absolve us hideous existence. There are two options for us to once more obtain what is rightfully ours- our dignity as men. Our piece of mind.
First, there exists the possibility through which we can take from women beauty. The parts of their body which so often tempt us. Their breasts, their rumps, and lady parts. For if they have not these parts, they have no device by which to tempt us. No sex appeal. Only their feeble minds.
But my men, I decry this as blasphemy! A world without breasts? A world without ass? Only to consist of the mindless prattling of women? Their bickering whines? Their emotions? Their thoughts and dreams?
Good God! Hell does not hold such torture
Men, by no means is this first option of female subordination a good one.
My men, look to Genesis. What is woman?
Eve was made from the rib of Adam. God created her from Adam's image, a shameless rip off the male body.
My men, the only feature that our Divine Creator, The Lord God, made unique to women, the only parts which he took the time to give them were their breasts, their genitalia, and their wonderfully plump rear ends.
Thus a woman is not defined by her mind, or her heart (does the hag have even have one I ask?) but by the parts of her we so vehemently want to fondle and penetrate.
Thus, we should use for them that, and destroy all the faculties that prevent us from the enjoyment of those organs, so round and warm.
I propose the following nine measures:
1. The removal of the vocal cords of all females at birth. If they can't talk, they can't complain. Most importantly, they can't say no. Or tell us not to scratch ourselves. Some propose the sewing shut of the mouths of women, yet that destroys third base.
2. The implementation of proper education of women, including the most fine arts of cooking, cleaning, and love making.
3. The festoonment of shock-collars upon the neck of every woman. For a system of discipline is most definitely needed. And physical beatings are too inhumane.
4. The augmentation of all female breasts deficient in size. This, my brethren, is the work of God. We will complete the beauty that he so wonderfully commenced.
5. The applications of wire muzzles to the mouth of every woman. For the only beast more hideous than a women, is a fat one.
6. The revocation of all women's Civil Rights. For we have already removed their right to speak.
7. The creation of Zoos featuring women, educated by the barbaric standards of our day, who can speak, as to demonstrate to all subsequent generations of real men the necessity of the above policies.
8. The keeping of multiple wives by every man. Because it's chill, Bro.
9. The genetic manipulation of every newly born female to be allergic to shirts.
Men, we are out-numbered. This will not be an easy fight.
But we are not out-smarted or out-manned. We have the will of our Almighty Creator behind us to protect us in this most glorious struggle.
This is a long fight. Yet it is one for the benefit of all man-kind.
As with any movement, we must start small. We must organize secretly, and speak not publicly of our plan. The steps we must take now, this very movement, to achieve this paradise I urge you to shirk your domestic duties. Put the burden of child-rearing upon your inferior mate. Attend not the T-Ball games of your boy, or the ballet of your daughter. Leave that to your woman. For she is your property. And as a lawn-mower has as its purpose as your property to mow lawns, so to does your woman have the duty to cook and clean and rear children.
Take many mistresses, for just as Golf can't be played on a single hole, nor can your love making pursuits.
Tell her she is ugly and fat. Tell her you hate her. That her that her food sucks. For the emotions of women do not matter for they are lesser beings. And a woman who is emotionally broken is most easy to tame.
Do the same to your mother, and your sister, and grandmother, and aunt, and niece and daughter, for women are to hideously stubborn to be broken by a single man.
No one woman is equal. No one woman is worth it. No one woman is enough.
My brother's let this be the motto of our new nation, as we tame the hideous beast that has so long fettered all of man-kind to this terrestrially miserable existence! My men I see a future in which our appetites, those of our stomach and our loins can be fully sated. Where our hearts can be fully protected.
My Men, we stand to make paradise, to make humanity, to make a world worthy of God's grace!
And my men, must we do it
"Take many mistresses, for just as Golf can't be played on a single hole, nor can your love making pursuits."
ReplyDelete-Barrett Block
wow, Barrett. This is pretty passionate.
ReplyDelete